Celebrate National Riverwalk Anniversary Day
April 30 is the highlight of any San Antonian’s calendar, marking the anniversary of when the first shovel dug the first hole in the Riverwalk, and this year marks our 80th anniversary of digging the world-famous San Antonio attraction (the Riverwalk).
Accidentally started by German settlers in 1929, initially as an attempt to dig a tunnel to move contraband spicy dried-meat goods from St Mary’s to Navarro Street, the tunnel quickly flooded and became an extension of the the river, which was originally created in 1563 by Missionaries floating logs from New Braunfels down to Corpus Christi.
All but two of the settlers were drowned in the two-foot deep channel, and the waterlogging of the crates of bratwurst led directly to the cancelation of Oktoberfest in the same year. Out of respect for the dead diggers, the Riverwalk’s name adopted ‘umlauts’ in 1930, until these were removed in 1999 due to new computer keyboards missing the double-dots.
Disney Joins In The Riverwalk-Mania.
Although Disney and the Riverwalk have frequently not seen eye-to-eye over the years due to the downplaying of San Antonio in their strongly anti-family movies, Disney has agreed to dedicate this April 30 to the San Antonio Riverwalk. After years of negotiations, the large mouse running the studio was apparently convinced by a large giraffe at another corporation to make the change, and the food is sponsored by a multinational run by clown.
Visit The Riverwalk would like to remind tourists that the Riverwalk offers significantly more fun, entertainment and Happy Hours than some dismal park full of rides and loud white children living perfect lives complete with both parents.
Join in the celebrations:
The Riverwalk Anniversary is such a major event in San Antonio that anyone with a birthday within 5 days of the event is legally forced to celebrate it in June or live somewhere else. For the rest of us though, the following fine Riverwalk establishments are hosting celebration-type celebrations:
- Tower Of The Americas (2pm): Tommy Lee Jones will be talking about his experiences on the Riverwalk growing up, while working his way through a bottle of Blanco 1888 tequila. Known for his firey temperament and kick-boxing skills, audiences are reminded not to taunt him for his woefully inadequate acting skills or his inability to get a sequel to The Fugitive made on the Riverwalk.
- Rivercenter Mall (4pm): “Riverwalk 5D!” is an interactive adventure “Where the fifth dimension is the FUN dimension!™”. This one hour ride in a motion simulator provides an ideal place to leave the kids trapped in the fun dimension while enjoying the Hooters 2-for-1 special next door.
- Crowning of the River Queen (6pm, location TBD): who will be the River Queen this year? Everyone’s guessing in San Antonio’s greatest thing to guess at! Will it be another 50-something alcoholic from an influential business and tourism group? If past history is anything to go by, that’s a surefire thigh-slapping ‘yes’.
- Reverse Happy Hour at The Crab Shack (8pm-11pm): The Crab Shack, one of most authentic chains on the river, is proud to announce their annual Crabstravaganza (sp?) where each table gets complimentary crabsticks with $3 longnecks and $2 Jello Shots! Arriving hungry and leaving happy, the Visit The Riverwalk editorial team will be there at 8pm prompt.
We hope you’ll revel in the Riverwalk’s explosion of fun and entertainment, starting on 30 April at 9am only the world-famous San Antonio Riverwalk. We’ll see you there.
